31st Sept. 2008
It's beginning to get late, and I'm already tired after a week of working.
'Don't give me no shit because
I've been tired' the Pixies sing, as though it is justification, as though it might be the source of our common humanity, as though it precedes and supersedes notions of morality. I can go with that some fair distance.
Why am I awake then?
I was hoping to talk to Helen, but I've been unable to get hold of her. This makes me restless.
I was also hoping to have progressed more this Summer with so many projects. None have been begun.
I feel impatient.
I've had some beautiful dreams recently. Other worlds. Sometimes I am me, sometimes not. Often people I know play out roles, but the dreams cut back and forth rapidly, things change; people are not themselves, or else they are two people, or their opposite, or not at all. In all of them, though, I am free to move. I can leap through the air, and catch myself, and climb and run.
Have you ever been staring out of the window on a long journey passing massive tracts of land, fields that seem endless, and wanted to just run through the fields? I know I would run and stumble, and itch and scratch and rapidly overheat and gasp and trip down. But there would be something perfect about bein able to run all the way through, without tiring, seeing what isn't seen, what is passed by without recognition.
My body aches. But I should hit the sack.
